You've never met any celebrities...and you don't really care.
Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the
highway.
"Vacation" means driving through the Amanas or going to Adventureland.
You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.
You measure distance in minutes.
Down south to you means Missouri.
You know several people who have hit a deer.
You have no problem spelling or pronouncing Des Moines.
You know the answer to the question, "Is this Heaven?"
Your school classes were cancelled because of cold.
Your school classes were cancelled because of heat.
You know what "Hawks, Panthers, and Clones" are.
You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way
You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day
You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better"
You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July
Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
You see people wearing bib overalls at funerals
You see a car running in the parking lot at the Quick Stop with no one
in it no matter what time of the year
You end your sentences with an unnecessary exposition. Example: "Where's my coat
at?"
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable or
animal.
You can locate Iowa on the U.S. map.
Detassling was your first job or that of a brother or sister.
You've been on a "Geode Hunt"
Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big
as the bun and accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice.
You learn your pickup will run without a muffler
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked
When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say "It
was different"
Being a bit younger, you remember Terry Branstad as the governor the whole time
you were growing up.
You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor
People from other states love to hear you say Iowa and other words with "Os" in
them
You carry jumper cables in your car
You drink "pop"
You know what the numbers 80, 35, 280 and 380 mean
You know what "cow chips" are.
You actually understand these statements and pass them on to all your Iowa
friends. |
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